From Venice, With Love

We walked down from 
Piazza San Marco
Vaparettos darting in and out 
Night mist along the Grand Canal
A large wooden door creaked open
I jumped at once into your arms
The reassuring sturdiness 
Of your ironically thin frame
Against my stocky shoulders 
Yet still I felt completely enveloped
By the safety of you
That was when you still loved me
Or I thought you did

Mediocre pasta at a little
Rustic restaurant 
With plenty of libations
Endless political conversations
Your white tipped hair 
Candlelight reflecting silver frames
Small scar just above thin lips
My long flowing strands
Sporting utterly ludicrous red lipstick 
A queer gal in drag
Yet somehow you made me feel
All woman
Like some old movie star
All makeup, curves and thighs 
That was when you still loved me
Or I thought you did

Our favorite hotel bartender
The show he put on every night
Heating your glass with wild flame
Before filling it with Remy Martin XO
I wonder if it’s still your favorite
Blue flames from my own sambuca
Endless white wine flowing 
Like the waters that would’ve covered us
Had we been sitting in that exact spot 
In 1966
Your laugh and smile and caress
Your desire and passionate touch 
White sheets and our legs entwined
That was when you still loved me
Or I thought you did

Hotel breakfast with window views of gondolas 
A morning kiss smelling of musky aftershave
They looked adoringly at us
You 20 years my senior
Getting one more shot at youth
Your hand was so warm in the Venetian cold
You passed as European 
Not I, every bit the loud American
“She’s so beautiful until she opens her mouth”
A British woman once said of me
Oh that I could’ve been mute those days
Pretend that I had never worked in a factory
Or callused my hands driving a forklift truck
Swearing prodigiously and chomping cigars
Pretending that before I met you I had 
Any knowledge at all of 
Fine wine
Fine art 
Fine dining
Yet you overlooked all that
Because that was when you still loved me
Or I thought you did

We walked along the Canal that winter 
As I tried to be your Chanel No. 5 wearing wife
As I tried to be everything I was not
Still, it was a nice reprieve
From my white trash nativeness
From the utter coarseness of my world
Playing at sophistication
Playing at love
Playing at marriage
But so long ago that I can smile now
When I get these memories
From Venice, With Love 
From the time 
When you still loved me
Or I thought you did